Night after night I tossed and turned in bed, tears of pain streaming down my face. Why was this all happening to me? Why me??? Why now???
Myriad questions still confront me. What next? Will things take a turn for the better again? Or will I have to reconcile myself to the sad state of affairs? Is there any hope left? Will I have to trudge on through it all, not knowing where the road I’m taking will lead me?
I think it’s best to just take one step at a time. I may not know where I’m headed, but I know Who leads me on. I may not know what the future has in store for me, but I know He’s with me right now. And I’m exactly where He wants me to be today. Tomorrow if He tells me to pack up and leave, I’m willing. Or if He says, “Stay!” I’ll do that too.
I guess I’ve just got to be like a little puppet in His hands (although that may sound silly and spineless). But that’s what He would want me to do – to submit myself so completely to Him, so that He can do His will through me – to have absolutely nothing of my will, but let Him have His way with me. To say “Lord I give you my heart, I give you my soul, Lord have Your way with me.”
Boy, that’s so tough! Nevertheless… not my will, but Yours be done!
“Don’t be afraid, I’ve redeemed you. I’ve called your name. You’re mine. When you’re in over your head, I’ll be there with you. When you’re in rough waters, you will not go down. When you’re between a rock and a hard place, it won’t be a dead end-” – Isaiah 43:1,2